A House Is Not Made By Buying But By Building Relationships: Ancient Hindu Teaching and Modern Day Relevance
The adage "A house is not made by buying but by building relationships" captures a fundamental truth that transcends time and culture. In Hinduism, this wisdom is deeply ingrained, reflecting the belief that a home is not merely a physical structure but a sanctuary of love, understanding, and mutual respect. This teaching is as relevant today as it was in ancient times, reminding us that the true essence of a home lies in the relationships nurtured within it.
Ancient Hindu Teachings on Home and Relationships
Hindu scriptures like the Vedas, Upanishads, and the epics—Ramayana and Mahabharata—emphasize the sanctity of the home (Griha) and the importance of relationships in creating a harmonious living space. The word "Griha" in Sanskrit doesn't just mean a house but signifies a dwelling that nurtures and sustains life, both physically and spiritually.
Ramayana: The epic Ramayana provides a profound example through the life of Lord Rama. When Rama, Sita, and Lakshmana were exiled to the forest, they created a home in the wilderness, not by erecting grand palaces but through their unwavering love, respect, and support for one another. Their bond exemplified that a true home is built through relationships, even in the most challenging circumstances.
Mahabharata: In the Mahabharata, the Pandavas, during their exile, were often without a permanent shelter. However, the bond they shared, especially with their mother Kunti and wife Draupadi, created a sense of home wherever they were. This illustrates that the emotional and spiritual ties between family members are what truly define a home.
Vedas and Upanishads: The Vedas often refer to the concept of "Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam," meaning "the world is one family." This concept underscores the importance of relationships, extending the idea of home beyond the immediate family to include society and the world at large. The Upanishads, especially the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad, talk about the significance of a harmonious household where love and dharma (righteousness) govern relationships.
The Modern Day Relevance of Building Relationships
In today's fast-paced world, the traditional notion of family and home is often overshadowed by material pursuits. People invest heavily in buying houses, often equating a bigger or more luxurious house with a happier life. However, without strong relationships, a house remains just a building—cold, empty, and devoid of true joy.
Mental and Emotional Well-being: Modern studies in psychology and sociology confirm what ancient Hindu teachings have always asserted—strong relationships are critical for mental and emotional well-being. A home where love, empathy, and understanding thrive fosters a sense of belonging and security, essential for a person’s overall health.
Community and Society: In contemporary society, the idea of "Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam" can be seen in the emphasis on community building. A neighborhood or community that values relationships and mutual respect becomes a safe and nurturing environment for everyone. This can be contrasted with isolated living situations, where despite the presence of luxurious homes, there is often a sense of loneliness and disconnection.
Work-Life Balance: The pressures of modern life often lead to a neglect of family time and relationships. However, there is a growing recognition of the need for work-life balance. Companies now encourage employees to spend quality time with their families, understanding that a supportive home environment translates into better productivity and job satisfaction.
Quotes from Hindu Scriptures on Relationships and Home
"Matru Devo Bhava, Pitru Devo Bhava, Acharya Devo Bhava, Atithi Devo Bhava" (Taittiriya Upanishad): This verse translates to "Mother is God, Father is God, Teacher is God, Guest is God." It emphasizes the importance of respecting and nurturing relationships with one's parents, teachers, and guests, highlighting that these relationships are sacred and central to the concept of a home.
"Dharma eva hato hanti dharmo rakshati rakshitah" (Manusmriti): This means "Dharma, when destroyed, destroys; Dharma, when protected, protects." Dharma, or righteous conduct, is the foundation of healthy relationships. When relationships are built on dharma, they create a home that sustains and protects its inhabitants.
"Annam Bahu Kurvita" (Taittiriya Upanishad): Meaning "Multiply food." This phrase, although referring to the physical act of providing food, symbolizes the importance of nurturing others, an act that strengthens relationships and builds a home.
The Importance of Rituals and Traditions in Building Relationships
In Hindu culture, rituals and traditions play a significant role in strengthening family bonds. Practices such as performing puja (worship) together, celebrating festivals, and observing rites of passage like weddings and naming ceremonies are not merely religious acts but are meant to bring the family closer.
Daily Puja: The daily practice of puja in Hindu homes serves as a reminder of the family's connection to the divine and to each other. It is a time when the family comes together, fostering a sense of unity and shared purpose.
Festivals: Hindu festivals like Diwali, Holi, and Raksha Bandhan are occasions for families to reunite, celebrate, and renew their bonds. These festivals are deeply rooted in the idea of reinforcing relationships, not just within the family but also within the community.
Lesser-Known Aspects of Hindu Teachings on Home and Relationships
Concept of "Samskara": Samskaras are rites of passage in Hindu tradition that mark important life events. These rites are performed to purify the individual and strengthen familial bonds. The "Griha Pravesh" ceremony, performed when entering a new house, is not just a ritual to bless the house but also to invoke blessings for the relationships that will be nurtured within it.
Role of Joint Families: The joint family system, once prevalent in India, is a testament to the Hindu belief in the strength of relationships. In a joint family, multiple generations live together under one roof, sharing responsibilities and supporting each other. This system, though less common today, exemplified the idea that a home is made not of bricks and mortar but of strong familial bonds.
Karma and Relationships: Hinduism teaches that the relationships we have in this life are influenced by our past karma. This belief encourages individuals to approach relationships with a sense of duty, patience, and compassion, understanding that nurturing these bonds is part of one's spiritual growth.
Conclusion
The ancient Hindu teaching that "a house is not made by buying but by building relationships" holds profound wisdom that is increasingly relevant in today’s world. In an era where material success is often prioritized, this teaching serves as a reminder of the enduring value of love, respect, and mutual understanding in creating a true home. By embracing these principles, we can build not just houses, but sanctuaries of peace, happiness, and spiritual growth that nurture us and future generations.