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You suffer when you hold on – You prosper when you let go

Holding on and not letting go is a big problem of our times. In holding on there is only suffering but when there is letting go there is freedom, happiness, growth and prosperity.

Parents hold on to children and do not let them pursue their dreams. Lovers hold on and suffer lifelong. Holding on is weakness and letting go is strength. There is peace, growth, prosperity and happiness in letting go.

The holding on is not limited to people, we also hold on to anger, hurt, grudge, hatred, revenge and many other negativities. They weaken us from within. This weakness soon reflects on our mental, emotional and physical health.

Some of us go into long periods of silence after a fight. This is not positive silence. This is a negative silence. This silence is like a volcano. Lot of hatred, abuse and negative activities are building up. We are holding on to the feeling of hurt and anger. It is not doing us any help. Let out the steam. Talk things out. When you are angry, just shout out and finish it. Move on by letting go. Do not become a volcano. This only damages health – the direct results are high blood pressure, heart attack, brain hemorrhage, or rupture of veins.

We also hold on to things. We have emotional and sentimental attachment to things that occupy space and add no value to our life. We might be having no use of them but still we keep them. The same thing when given off will be of great use to someone else. But we not have the courage to do it. It stays with us and it constantly reminds us about something positive or negative that happened in the past. It is a wire that connects us to happy or unhappy past.

Holding on in relationship creates mental and emotional wounds that never heal. People suffer, tolerate and stick on forcibly in such relationship. There is no bonding and trust. There is no positivity and no activity. Such a relationship is like two logs tied and left to float in the river. There is no future. There is no destination to reach. Just that one is holding on to the other forcibly.

Holding on means there is lot of bad energy. The person who is holding on has little or no energy. The person is feeding off on the other person’s energy. Such a needy person will leave the other person gasping for freedom and energy. Those who hold on to others constantly create drama, play the victim card, constant complaining, regular attempts to get sympathy, talks about suicide and abandonment, and such people also never take responsibility of their actions.

Holding on through emotional drama is more common in love and romance.

Digging up past - incidents, contribution, suffering - is another tactic done by those who forcibly hold on to a relationship. This is seen more in family, and among relatives and friends.

The person who is suffering in a relationship is also responsible for this holding on. The person knows very well that the other person is sucking life out. Still in the name of family, status, society, finance or other reasons tolerate and remain in such a relationship. But remember it is not possible to sustain such a relationship for long term. It will break down and when it happens, there will be lot of fireworks.

Let go, say firm no, and stay clear of energy-sapping people and things. Do it at the earliest. Never delay in letting go. Instead of suffering in a relationship, allocate time and energy to that we do best and enjoy most.

There are many difficulties in our life by letting go we can lessen many of our difficulties.

www.hindu-blog.com
Abhilash