Preta Kalyanam, which literally means “the marriage of the dead" is followed by certain communities of South Karnataka and the Kasaragod district of Kerala. This centuries-old tradition is still carefully observed even today.
But why does this happen? Behind it lies a deep belief and
unspoken grief. People of these societies believe that children or adolescents
who die before reaching marriageable age—usually before 18—do not find peace
after death.
Because of this incompleteness, these restless souls are
thought to bring misfortune to their living relatives, especially to those
trying to conceive children or those who remain unmarried.
To avoid such misfortunes, families consult an astrologer,
who declares that the only way for the soul to attain moksha (liberation) is
through marriage.
Thus, to ensure the peace of their deceased child’s soul, families arrange such a marriage once the child’s spirit reaches a symbolic marriageable age.
They believe that those who have departed are not truly
gone, but live among the living in the form of spirits—and hence, they too need
a married life.
Therefore, the Preta Kalyanam (also called Preta Maduve)
ceremony is conducted just like a regular wedding. In place of the bride or
groom, dolls or their clothing are used. The marriage is fixed between two dead people just like the normal marriage alliance.
On the wedding day, the groom’s family visits the bride’s
house, carrying a doll dressed as the groom and new clothes for the bride. The
bride’s doll is dressed in those clothes. Then, the two families together place
garlands around the necks of the dolls, completing the wedding ritual.
After the feast, the groom’s family takes both dolls home.
That night, the dolls are placed under a Saptaparna (umbrella tree) or a
similar sacred tree near the groom’s home. This symbolizes the completion of an
unfulfilled life.
Although modern societies dismiss this as superstition, for
these communities it remains a deeply human expression of love and respect for
the departed.
This very rare ritual continues to be practiced in parts of Karnataka and Kerala to this day—for the peace of beloved souls and the well-being of the family.