Most of us are psychologically dependent, not only on people, but on property, on beliefs, on dogmas. Are we at all conscious of that fact? If we know that we do depend on something for our psychological happiness, for our inward stability, security, then we can ask ourselves why.
Why do we psychologically depend on something? Obviously, because in ourselves we are insufficient, poor, empty; in ourselves we are extraordinarily lonely, and it is this loneliness, this emptiness, this extreme inward poverty and self enclosure that makes us depend on a person, on knowledge, on property, on opinion, and on so many other things which seem necessary to us.
To know your own emptiness, you must look at it, but you cannot look at it if your mind is all the time seeking a distraction from the fact that it is empty.
…in our capacity to look at ourselves without judgement, without condemnation, without comparison, because we have all been trained to compare, to judge, to evaluate, to give an opinion. Only when the mind sees the futility of all that, the absurdity of it, is it capable of looking at itself. Then that which we have feared as being lonely, empty is no longer empty. Then there is no psychological dependence on anything; then love is no longer attachment, but something entirely different, and relationship has quite another meaning.
Source - Choiceless awareness: a selection of passages for the study of the teachings By Jiddu Krishnamurti